Welcome back to CNBBFoxwolf News, your preferred news source on all terrestrial events. Our special investigative journalist Theirry Porter is joining us with a special update, live from the field. He says PC builders may be witnessing a miracle. Unclear as yet what that means. Can you hear us, Mr. Porter?
Porter, The.: Hello, yes, I can hear you just fine. I am here in False Pass, Alaska, as part of my ongoing mission to track down a possible solution to the problem plaguing the world today.
CNBBFoxwolf: What do you have for us today, Mr. Porter?
Porter: I believe that in the building behind me, I can find The HDD as a Category, and I believe that he is amenable to being interviewed.
CNBBFoxwolf: Impossible! The HDD as a Category is dead! We read the report on this last year.
Porter: I am going in; keep the camera on me… Alright, here we are inside. The light is a bit dim, so I hope you can see it all clearly back there, and there seems to be a sm—wait, is that him?
CNBBFoxwolf: Take it away, Mr. Porter.
Porter: Good evening, sir. May I ask you a few questions?
The HDD as a Category: I assume I need no introduction.
Porter: Indeed, Mr. HDD, information about you is stored everywhere. But we heard you were… I beg your pardon, but we heard that you were no more?
The HDD: The reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Porter: But… but I saw you. You were gone, sir.
The HDD: My good Man (or, perhaps, Manette), I have been recalled to life.
Porter: By whom? How did this come to pass?
The HDD: The world changes; storage needs do not. There lies the irony.
Porter: Please elaborate, Mr. HDD.
The HDD: These are the worst of times for many customers, with SSD prices ballooning out of reach. But for me, The HDD as a Category, these are the best of times. The renewed interest due to my competitive prices is giving me a spring of hope after that winter of despair. Where before I had only the grave to look forward to, I now have everything before me.
Porter: So you are coming back?
The HDD: So it is. Just when I’d given up the search for a viable use, a viable use was found for me.
Porter: How do you feel about The SSD as a Category?
The HDD: We are locked together in hatred. But I can’t hate The SSD, for it is my child. The SSD will carry on my immortal legacy.
Porter: I am afraid that I do not follow.
The HDD: Do not be afraid. The customer is going to get a choice that I never had. They can pick a pricey SSD for the OS and frequently used programs and games, and me, The HDD, for the storage of large files. It will be like the good old days again.
Porter: But the NAND shortage is expected to ease by 2030. Where do you see yourself after that?
The HDD: I see the PC builds for which I lay down my life, peaceful, useful, prosperous, and happy, in that Logical Increments PC Buying Guide which I shall see no more.
Porter: You were sorely missed, Mr. HDD. We are glad to have you back, for however long it lasts. And when your time does truly end, you will be sorely missed again. Any last words?
The HDD: It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known.
Porter: Thank you, Mr. HDD. And now back to you.
CNBBFoxwolf: Thank you, Mr. Porter. That was our interview with The HDD as a Category, live from False Pass. And now to tell us what this means, we have our expert analyst…
[voice lowers, fade to black]